Thaum tham nrog cov npoj yaig hauv kev lag luam, qee tus ntseeg tias kev lag luam tsis zoo yog vim tsis muaj cov khoom lag luam lossis cov khoom hloov tshiab qeeb. Kuv xav tias qhov no yog muab lub laub ua ntej tus nees - nws yog ib rooj plaub uas tau txais qhov laj thawj thiab qhov cuam tshuam rov qab. Kuv txoj kev nkag siab yog tias thaum lub khw lag luam qeeb, nws tsis yog vim cov neeg siv khoom tsis muaj kev xaiv, tab sis vim lawv ntshai xaiv.
Thaum tus neeg siv khoom taug kev hauv koj lub khw, cov lus nug tiag tiag ntawm lawv lub siab tsis yog "Kuv yuav yuav dab tsi?" tab sis "Qhov twg kuv yuav tsis khuv xim yuav?" Dab tsi cov neeg siv khoom ntshai feem ntau yog siv nyiaj thiab tsis tau txais cov khoom uas lawv nyiam tiag tiag. Yog tias koj lub khw muag khoom tsis muaj cov khoom lag luam zoo li no, qhov tshwm sim yuav yog qhov uas lawv saib ib puag ncig thiab tawm ntawm qhov khoob - tes - thiab ib txwm, koj lub lag luam yuav tsis vam meej.
Txhawm rau kom koj lub khw muaj kev vam meej, koj yuav tsum muaj cov khoom lag luam uas cov neeg siv khoom tsuas yog yuav tsum tau yuav thaum lawv taug kev hauv.
Lub hom phiaj ntawm qhov "yuav tsum-yuav" cov khoom no tsis yog kom tau nyiaj xwb; nws txoj haujlwm loj tshaj plaws yog tsim kom muaj kev ntseeg siab rau cov neeg siv khoom. Nws qhov tseeb muaj nqis nyob rau hauv kev ua kom cov neeg siv khoom xav, lub sijhawm lawv taug kev, tias "lub khw no ntseeg tau."
Cov khoom "yuav tsum-yuav" muaj ob peb yam tseem ceeb. Koj tuaj yeem tshawb xyuas yog tias koj lub khw muaj ib qho uas haum rau cov qauv no: Ua ntej yog kev paub- nws yog cov khoom lag luam uas cov neeg siv khoom paub zoo, suav nrog nws qhov tsw, kev ntxhib los mos, nqe, thiab lwm yam. Thaum cov neeg muas zaub yuav ib yam dab tsi paub, lawv xav tias tsis tshua muaj kev dag; Qhov thib ob yog siab ntim thiab muag khoom siab. Cov khoom lag luam uas muag zoo yam tsis muaj kev txo nqi lossis kev txhawb nqa yog cov neeg siv khoom ntseeg siab tshaj plaws; cov nuj nqis muag thaum muag thiab kev tshaj tawm feem ntau muaj qee tus lej nce ntxiv; Qhov thib peb yog qhov yooj yim ntawm kev pom zoo. Qee cov khoom lag luam muaj cov khoom xyaw nyuaj uas nyuaj los piav qhia meej, thiab cov neeg siv khoom tsis muaj lub siab ntev los mloog cov lus piav qhia ntev, yog li kev pom zoo yooj yim yog qhov tseem ceeb ntawm qhov yuav tsum tau- yuav khoom.
Qhov teeb meem ntawm cov nyiaj tau los rau "yuav tsum-yuav" cov khoom tsis yog hais txog ntawm no vim tias cov khoom no tsis yog koj cov khoom lag luam siab tshaj plaws (txawm tias koj yeej yuav tsum tsis txhob siv poob- cov khoom lag luam rau lub hom phiaj no). Cov khoom no pab txhawb kom muaj kev ntseeg siab rau cov neeg siv khoom; ib zaug lawv xav tias qhov kev ntseeg no, lawv yuav muaj feem ntau tuaj tos koj lwm cov khoom ntawm impulse. "Yuav tsum-yuav" cov khoom yog qhov pib ntawm kev tsim cov neeg siv khoom ntseeg siab, thiab lawv tuaj yeem tsav kev muag khoom thoob plaws koj lub khw.
Txoj hauv kev los tsav lub khw muag khoom yog kom muaj tag nrho lwm yam khoom "qhib" kev ntseeg siab los ntawm qhov yuav tsum tau- yuav khoom. Piv txwv li, tso cov khoom tuaj tshiab lossis cov khoom tshwj xeeb ntawm ib sab ntawm qhov yuav tsum tau- yuav cov khoom kom cov neeg siv khoom tuaj yeem pom lawv thiab xav tias, "Cov khoom ntawm lub khw no kuv ntseeg yuav tsum tsis txhob phem heev." Qhov no ua rau nws yooj yim dua los qhia lawv.
Lub hauv paus logic yog qhov no: kev ntseeg siab yog hloov tau. Yog tsis muaj qhov yuav tsum tau- yuav khoom, txhua yam khoom tshiab uas koj tso tawm yuav tsum tau pib los ntawm kos kom ntseeg tau cov neeg siv khoom; nrog rau yuav tsum- yuav khoom, txhua yam khoom tshiab tsim los ntawm qhov kev ntseeg siab uas twb muaj lawm.
Ua raws li cov laj thawj no, kev txhim kho ntawm lub khw lag luam tuaj yeem nkag siab tau raws li hauv qab no: siv tus nqi rau cov nyiaj (zoo- rau- tus nqi piv) ntawm koj "yuav tsum- yuav" cov khoom kom tau txais kev ntseeg siab ntawm cov neeg siv khoom, kom cov neeg siv khoom muaj kev xaiv thaum nkag mus rau hauv lub khw. Tom qab ntawd, siv cov "yuav tsum-yuav" cov khoom los tsav kev muag khoom ntawm lwm yam khoom, hloov qhov kev ntseeg siab rau lawv. Qhov no tsim "kev yuav khoom- ntseeg- rov yuav khoom" lub voj voog, thiab lub khw muag khoom lag luam yuav vam meej.
Thaum siv qhov no hauv kev xyaum, tsis txhob poob siab los ntawm kev txhawj xeeb txog "tsis muaj khoom txaus" lossis "tsis hloov kho cov khoom muag sai txaus." Xwb, pib los ntawm kev txheeb xyuas ib yam khoom hauv koj lub khw uas cov neeg siv khoom xav yuav yam tsis muaj kev cuam tshuam, tsom mus rau kev ua tiav nws, thiab siv nws los tsim kom muaj kev ntseeg siab rau cov neeg siv khoom hauv koj lub khw. Tsuas yog tom qab ntawd koj yuav tsum hais txog lwm yam teeb meem.
